Monday, January 5, 2009

New Year's Resolution, Lose Weight, Buy New Rack

I wrote this entry in January. I've still got the same set, but they are another month older and their wrinkles are set. So now it's Oscar Sunday and I'm feeling like I need some girly girly dresses. But not strapless.

It's been two years plus and it may be time to buy a new set. Prosthetic breasts wear out over time. My first ones leaked at the seams, my second set saw one boob suffer a rupture of its skin, revealing a slightly sticky gelatinous "flesh" colored mass of silicone. Good thing it was an external rupture. (O.k., I know the substance that fills implanted breasts is different in consistency and color but apparently behaves the same if let loose from the skin that contains it.)

Two years of body oils and the soaps that remove said oils take a toll on the integrity of the skin of the prosthesis and eventually they fail. So then it's off to the store to get fitted in one of the latest improved (no really, these are so much better than those old ones that fit you perfectly and looked like what you remember your breasts looking like.) awesomely good new styles that are now available in that same weird "flesh" color.
Oh, you don't want that color? Well, we can order ones that are as far from your real color as these but in the other direction, so they'll be much darker than you, but that's closer, yes? No, we don't have those in stock because we don't have many women of color shopping here at high end department store what carried the brand that you like.

Are there really lots of black women walking around with white girl (and not exactly white, it's that "flesh" color) boobs on? Or do they all know about a store where we are catered to, but still can only find boobs the color of root beer candy? Me, I'd be happy with Kraft caramels.